There has been a lot of pain in my life over the past few years with an especially hard summer in which I experienced the loss of loved ones due to complications of life and the ultimate simplicity of death.

There was so much death in my life this summer that my therapist reflected to me that perhaps the universe was merely trying to convey to me that death is a part of life…  (To which I replied, “Yeah, I get it already…”)

But I don’t think that this is my lesson at all.  I don’t think that my lesson is about death.  I think my lesson is about life.  Life is precious.  Life is short.  And every moment that we have is a miracle.

I am prone to  think that these kind of statements can be trite and yet, today, they speak only truth to me.  Today, I learned how deeply true they are.

I’ve been away traveling and am finally back in town after many weeks away. This morning,  I had brunch with some of my best friends and most favorite people in the world.  But before brunch my friend, Jonathon, asked to speak to me privately.  Now, if you’ve lived the last few years that I have lived, you know, without a doubt, that when someone asks to speak to you privately, they are about deliver a terrible blow.    And he did.

Our friend, Bryan, committed suicide while I was away.

And I don’t know what to say about this other than it is a tragedy and a great loss and we will all miss him profoundly. And I am so sorry that he was in so much emotional pain.  I truly pray that he is in peace now.

And so I contemplate life and the people that I love and that love me.  And I acknowledge in this moment, what a miracle life and love are and how lucky we all are to experience them.  I forget this too often.  I miss so many moments.  I take so much for granted.   (I am not berating myself or angry with myself, but it is true nonetheless.)

And so in this moment and in every moment that I can remember to do so,  I will love myself and others as well as I can.  I will be present.  I will be grateful.  I will see the beauty that is there right in front of me.  I will laugh as deeply as I can.  I will sing and I will dance.  I will cherish and enjoy because this life is only a moment and then it is gone.

And I will always remember Bryan and wish him love. And in remembrance of a life lost way too soon,  I endeavor to live mine fully.  This is the only gift I have to give…..